Eat, eat, eat and eat. My life revolved around unhealthy food. Don’t feel like cooking? No problem: pizza, kebab or even ice cream from Ice Taxi were easily ordered and conveniently delivered to the door.
On the way we went to MC Donalds, Burger King or in the market there was curry sausage with french fries. Why cook healthy when it can be so easy?
My weight had reached 128 kg with a height of 1.63 cm, my health deteriorated: herniated disc, type 2 diabetes, pelvic pain, high blood pressure, my asthma got worse, every day I struggled with dizziness, rapid heartbeat, chest pain, lack of oxygen and severe tiredness. There was also playing with the children, household chores and shopping. Anything to do with exercise was difficult.
I was exhausted and short of breath. it could not go on like that. My doctor and cardiologist recommended weight loss. But I didn’t know how.
My partner was very overweight himself, he weighed 180 kilos and more with a height of 1.91 cm, had difficulties at work, was bullied and was on sick leave for weeks and applied for a three-week cure.
He lost a few kilos there and my ambition was awakened. But I wanted to find my own way to lose weight and found out more about it on the Internet.
I started with the paleo diet (avoiding dairy products, potatoes, rice, pasta, wheat / whole grain / rye / spelled flour and sugar), bought books on the subject of paleo and found out more. I couldn’t do without sweets, which is why I introduced snack days.
But there was always only a little something from the cash register and on Sundays I ate normal supper – mostly fried potatoes, which I missed painfully.
In the beginning I didn’t lose a single pound and asked myself: Have I failed? Today I know that it takes time for the body to access fat reserves.
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“I felt like a failure”
In any case, I was mad at myself and felt like a failure. I stood naked in front of the mirror and judged myself very harshly. I scolded myself, scolded the industry with all the goodies, my parents who had never taught me to eat healthy / properly, my dad often insulted me even though he is overweight himself.
The result of these thoughts was that it was my own fault and no one had forced me to eat so much.
From then on it clicked in my head and my scales showed me the first weight loss. My partner came back from the regimen and got used to the new diet.
It became a competition between him and me. I made a motivation plan that I attached to the fridge, my starting weight and my target weight were on it. From 120 kilos there was a reward, for example eating french fries, at 115 kg a visit to Mc Donalds, etc. After a while I no longer needed a reward.
My values at the doctor improved, the fight with my partner continued. I was getting happier because I lost so much weight. Although I lost more weight than my partner, I was never praised, and my partner even more for it.
He has received high praise from his and my family. I was told that I would soon be gaining weight again and staying fat anyway. Nobody saw that I was the driving force behind it all. But in my head I stayed strong and thought: “I will prove to you that I am strong”!
“Suddenly the alarm bells rang for me”
Then suddenly I gained weight again, my weight rose from 93 kilos to 98 and the alarm bells rang in my head.
When I needed new ideas about food, I looked on the Internet again and came across low-carb diets.
Dairy products and sugar substitutes (birch sugar, coconut blossom sugar, honey and agave syrup) were allowed. My joy in healthy eating came back and I enjoyed cooking and eating again. I realized that diet alone was no longer enough to lose weight permanently and I realized that it only helps to do sport.
The beginning was hard and cruel, twice a day I ran a mini lap, at a snail’s pace, but I held out bravely. After a while I was able to run the lap and my laps got longer and longer, so that I only went running in the morning. The kilos also went down again.
Since I didn’t want to keep buying new pants, I got myself a belt that was a tad too tight. The belt has 73 holes, today I’m at hole 39 and I’ve got the belt almost twice around my waist – what an achievement!
“You have to give the body the time it needs”
In terms of sport, it should also continue, influencer Anne Bodykiss motivated me to continue with her videos on Youtube.
Losing weight wasn’t fast enough for me, I put a lot of pressure on myself. But you should give your body the time it needs. Sport was now part of my everyday life.
It went well up to 70 kilos, then came to a standstill for 8-12 weeks. It was tough for me because I strictly followed my diet and exercised, but still nothing happened. I continued to lose waist size. My goal was to lose another 10 pounds.
I signed up for the gym and the 60 kilos were there quickly. Goal achieved, I thought. My excess skin on my stomach just wouldn’t go away, so I started jogging, biking, and going to the gym.
But the skin flaps just didn’t go away, so I decided to have an abdominal and breast lift that was even paid for by health insurance – as a reward that I had managed to lose so much on my own.
On April 8th, 2018 the time had come: I ran my first half marathon in Berlin. On Saturday morning I picked up the documents and was as happy as a little child. I ran and ran and ran and after I crossed the finish line, tears of joy came to me. Joy of having achieved my goal, a heavy burden fell from me.
I’m proud of myself, I still can’t understand that I’m a good runner, that my speed is very good for my age and my background. I’ve only been running for 22 months, after all, and yes, I’ll be a repeat offender, I love it. This struggle with the weight and with myself has paid off.
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